


Poems

by MiaVivisol



Series: Overcast skies, ray of sun shining through [2]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV), Tales from the Shadowhunter Academy - Cassandra Clare, The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare, The Shadowhunter Chronicles - Cassandra Clare
Genre: Gen, Other, Poems
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-28
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-11-20 03:39:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11327883
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiaVivisol/pseuds/MiaVivisol
Summary: Remember the notebook of poems Alec keeps in his box (mentioned in Chapter 1 of 'Everybody Needs Some Help Sometimes')?Here's what's written inside.





	1. Chapter 1

__  
You are not your age,  
Nor the size of the clothes you wear,  
You are not a weight,  
Or the colour of your hair.  
You are not your name,  
Or the dimples in your cheeks,  
You are all the books you read,  
And all the words you speak.  
You are your croaky morning voice,  
And the smiles you tried to hide,  
You're the sweetness in your laughter,  
And every tear you've cried.  
You're the songs you sing so loudly,  
When you know you're all alone,  
You're the places that you've been to,  
And the one that you call home.  
You're the things that you believe in,  
And the people that you love,  
You're the photos in your bedroom,  
And the future you dream of.  
You're made of so much beauty,  
But it seems that you forgot,  
When you decided you were defined,  
By all the things you're not. 

-Earl Hanson


	2. Chapter 2

I want   
To be held   
Against your chest   
Hand splayed, covering my back   
Hand playing with my hair   
Knees tucked into my stomach   
When the tears come   
Quietly dripping   
Even as I start to smile   
Knowing you will be by my side 

Instead I hold my pillow   
Teeth gripping my blanket   
Screaming   
In my mind   
As the sobs rip out   
Echo through my empty room   
Wishing   
Wishing for a smile, a look, a pleasant word  
For a soothing touch   
For a gentle kiss   
On a forehead 

Sleep holds me as my tears dry  
As I wonder   
Why I can not be   
As you wanted me   
Why I can not sit quietly   
In the corner   
Why I can not yield   
To your rebuking words  
Why I can not will myself   
To be completely yours 

I can not change my soul  
I can not be a shadow   
I can not be who you thought I would be  
But as I lie alone on my cold bed  
I wonder  
Wonder   
If you would have taken me   
If I had only tried harder to be not- me  
Because it couldn't have been   
More painful than this   
Could it?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this


	3. Chapter 3

I remember to forget  
The things I have done  
The wrongs I have ignored  
Because there is a clean conscience  
Behind every forgetful one

They have sinned  
For their lives  
For their souls   
To save their innocence   
By losing it on the way

It takes one to know one   
What secret of mine   
Do you know about?   
What do you plan   
To hold above my head? 

Take all of my secrets far away   
I can't look at them   
And neither can you   
Because every innocent   
Is a sinner who remembers to forget.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is not exactly related to the fandom, but I really wanted to share these with you. Alec's gonna quote these later in ENSHS, and though it's not exactly needed, I thought you'd enjoy it.


End file.
